Who was that woman? She was middle aged, smartly dressed and kinda sexy in an older woman way. She was stood over the road from my flat and she was taking photos. She had a big telescopic lens camera on a tripod and was snapping away. Not just of anything, oh no. Her camera was […]
Cut your own hair.
Merrily chopping away at your long locks you will end up with a ridiculous and comical fringe. You do not want to leave your flat because everyone will laugh at you. They do. You cannot glue it back on but you will give it a go anyway.
Have you seen the drummer’s hair?
Just One More
It is late. It is a school day tomorrow. You are not quite sure what exactly is happening. You started drinking beer at midday and have just finished off your second bottle of wine and forgotten to eat. Your stereo is blasting out the latest Foals tune and something appears to be on […]
As I was walking past the Whitechapel Bell Foundry this morning I noticed a man standing stock still by the side of the road. What was particularly striking and rather disturbing was that the only item of clothing he was wearing was a tiny pink pair of decorated underpants. I tried to avert my eyes. […]
I returned to my flat to discover the front door ajar. I live alone so this was a real shock. I had a terrible sinking feeling of dismay and trepidation as my sphincter shrank to the size of a pea. I have been burgled before and I can assure you that it is a horrible […]