Nelson Galaxy

Let me explain.

I was hijacked. Barry Barrington took advantage of me whilst I was trapped under a landslide of work and rubble. He infiltrated my website. I apologise if he upset anybody, he usually does because that is his main skill. He is a drunk and a disgrace and an embarrassment.

I met Barry a couple of years ago in notorious Whitechapel gangster haunt The Blind Beggar. He seemed like an affable chap and we got talking. He caught my attention due to the fact that he was dressed head to foot in a brown bear costume, from his little pointy ears to the pads over his shoes. He was drinking a double whisky through a straw. He told me his story.

Barry had been born Beary. His father was a drunk and arrived to sign the birth certificate in a rather merry frame of mind. For his own amusement he deliberately misspelt his son’s name and from that day forth Barry had to live under the curse of the bear. He was ridiculed in school and in the workplace and tried to renounce his beary origins.

Until the day he decided to embrace the bear. He realised he did not need to keep this side of himself secret and came out to the world as a brown Alaskan bear. From that day forth he was always attired in a fully consuming bear costume. He had become the bear he always wanted to be. However, the ridicule did not cease and out of depression and misery he resorted to the bottle, believing that one day society would accept him as he really was.

I felt for Barry for I too had kept a secret for most of my life and we bonded over a barrel full of booze. That does not stop him being a drunken fool dressed as a bear. Weirdo.