Nelson Galaxy

What you really need at four in the morning is for someone to incessantly ring your entry-phone door buzzer. Not just once or twice but over and over again, for over ten minutes. Usually, I will just ignore such intrusive behaviour; it will be a drunk or a tramp or my ex.

However, the buzzing was so frenzied I panicked. I was worried that it may be the fire brigade desperately trying to save my life because all the flats below me are on fire. Or it may have been a beautiful maiden in peril, needing help from a gallant knight. So I pulled myself out of bed and answered the intercom.

“Yeah?”
“I want number 15.”
“This is not number 15.”
“I want number 15.”

I continued to explain that the flat they were buzzing was not number 15. However, they were adamant that I could assist them to gain entry to number 15. After ten minutes of explaining I could not expedite his ceaseless request the man became angry with me.

“Look f**k boy, let me in, I want number 15. I f*****g s**t on you. Burn you down.”

I was becoming progressively frustrated. Loosing my temper I swore at the man and in no uncertain terms told him to go away. Did he know what time it was? I slammed the intercom down and went back to bed.

My advice to you is not to swear at someone who is ringing your buzzer at four in the morning. The little b*****d will proceed to buzz away, over and over and over again, for the next 45 minutes. I wonder if he did ever get into number 15. Maybe I should give them a visit to see if I can express my gratitude.