Nelson Galaxy

I was flicking through the TV channels on Saturday morning to, unexpectedly, come across live coverage of Mansfield Town on BBC1’s Match of the Day. They were playing Middlesbrough in the FA Cup. I know it is very unusual for me to write about any kind of sport, never mind football. I admit, I am not a fan of football. I find it excruciatingly boring and any team that I find myself rooting for have always lost, especially England, leaving me frustrated and angry.

So what piqued my interest? I grew up in Mansfield and to a tiny degree would like to see the local team achieve some kind of sporting glory. I do not like the town but it is still the place I came from. I moved out when I was eighteen to experience the lights and drag clubs of olde London Town. Before the match there was a piece about the town itself, it does look attractive from a distance. There were interviews with the Lord Mayor and the editor of the Chad, the local newspaper, in whose hallowed pages I have stared.

Moments before kick-off, the camera panned around Field Mill and focused on a small section of the crowd. “That’s odd,” I said, “I’m sure I know who that is.” Bizarrely I was looking at my step dad, on BBC1. Napoleon has had his time in front of the cameras. My mother was in a documentary about people obsessed with lists. It is my turn next. I was in a Suede video once, so there. Fortunately for my step dad he wasn’t doing anything embarrassing, like picking his nose or berating an immigrant.

According to the commentators, Mansfield gave an outstanding performance on the pitch. In fact, they played so well they lost by two goals to none. They even scored a home goal. Well done the Stags.