Nelson Galaxy

There has been a large turnout to polling stations in the U.S. for the New Hampshire presidential primary. I am not really interested in American politics, after-all look who the president is - intelligent guy. What caught my attention happened during one of Hilary Clinton’s campaign stops. Two men in the crowd started to scream, “Iron my shirt” at the former first lady, and had specially produced placards.

I am just so happy that sexism is so rife and strong in the States. Where would we be without it? Who would iron our shirts and make our dinner? I have only once ever tried to iron a shirt and found it a tiresome and unsatisfactory affair. Maybe I should put a call through to Hilary and suggest she pops round to Stepney for a quick intimate session of hot ironing.

I can’t wait until I’m president. I would not be President Evil. I will be the first punk pop transvestite president. I will abolish homophobia, sexism, racism and all other bigoted uneducated views. I will make plastic surgery compulsory and all women’s shoes will go up to size 11. Everyone will have to wear eyeshadow and grow their hair. It may sound ridiculous but it’d be better than that Bush fellow.